2:15 PM Sunday, August 03, 2003

Wow...

A guy tells you he's willing to give up everything for you, because he loves you. And you look at him and considering what a nice man you know he is, you make room in yourself to believe what he's saying.

And then, he kisses another girl in front of you.

And even if you're not holding him to his declaration of love... you cannot help but be more cynical about it.

And then later on, he insists on bringing you home... and because he could feel waves and waves of displeasure emanating from you... he apologizes for insisting to accompany you home...

And you get more insulted that... well... he didn't find anything out of whack with embracing some other woman.

He even tells you that woman knows how much he loves you. And again, giving him the benefit of the doubt that their lips aren't actually locking when their heads are tilted a certain angle.... there is still the fact that you don't talk to 'buddies' that way.

And you, in all your weird kind of kindness.... even ask yourself if you'd been malicious... if actually, them hugging together that way was just an ordinary thing to do.

But then again, you're reminded of the fact that though you sometimes lean your head on your labskis' shoulders/chest, you don't actually talk to them with your face so close in front of their faces... and you don't lean too much towards them... and more than that, you don't do that in front of any other guy who you know has feelings for you, regardless of whether you return those feelings or not...

Isn't it just basic etiquette after all to not cause pain as much as you can?

And so, you're offended. You're insulted. And you lose some more faith in men.

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