MEComposing

these tears fall
not because
you're not loved
or cared for

these tears fall
not because
you were not trusted
and you were not seen
for who you truly are

these tears fall
not because i've given up
on you
nor because i didn't have
faith in you

these tears fall
not because we cannot live
the dreams we had
and can never really be
the lovers we wanted to be

these tears fall because
you betrayed my trust
and lied to me
and disrespected me

these tears fall
not because i failed to love you
but because i realized
you do not love me at all
that you never really loved me
after all

and these tears will continue falling
until i accept you're not worth them
until i akcowledge you never deserved me
and until i realize i love you no more

for you lied
and your words weren't true
and your actions didn't match your words
which led to all these tears
falling...

*~*

I am a woman. I have a heart that can be deceived. I have a kindness that will be abused. I am a woman. Men will not be able to help but hurt me. And lie to me. And lead me on. And use me. And capitalize on my inherent ability for compassion and care. I am a woman. And I cannot help but cry. Even if the man doesn't deserve the tears. I am a woman. I get devastated with lies. I get traumatized when things I believed in, like love, like a man's words, or a person (regardless of whether he sees himself the same way) gets invalidated by a single, disrespectful action... like a lie.

I am a woman. I have breaking points. I have boiling points. I draw the line somewhere.

I am a woman. I will forgive a lot of things. I will understand a lot of things. I will accept and adjust to a lot of things. I will turn a blind eye to a lot of faults.

But not to lies. Never to lies.