6:19 PM Friday, October 01, 2004
BF No. 4 texted this morning, inviting me to his wedding come December 18. I was actually happy for him, more worried that he was waiting for me all along to come around and be in love with him back... especially since his parents once already informally talked to my parents about finding me very much favorable for their son. I congratulated him and everything but already told him that I doubt i'd be in Lipa that time (my weekends are really precious and decembers are usually really hectic). The weird thing was, the ex also asked me to be a bridesmaid at his wedding. He insisted for me to do this favor for him. I just said I was sorry but am real busy.
WTF was that all about! We weren't childhood friends with a past that transcends the usual romantic relationships... why would he want me parading around in the same entourage as his bride? Isn't that disrespectful of the bride? (well, i dunno about you, but getting someone who used to tongue my groom for a bridesmaid is just not my cup of what's sane and proper)
*~*
Read some of AE's posts in some msg board (and no, I wasn't stalking the guy). It was bittersweet knowing that he has a picture of some girl in his wallet, someone he used to exert extras for, and also know that girl is with someone else.
I was torn between wondering whether he thinks of me sometimes too... with my ego a little miffed that i'm not anymore the one he writes poems and lovely letters about... and sad that his relationship didn't work out with that girl.
I really wish that guy well... and now am able to feel sorry for him, it must have been hellish that my feelings for him before imposed rather than inspired. And i know am not the easiest woman to please and be with.
