MEComposing

Tito Jose is my father's brother. They never really knew what went wrong with him, but suffice it to say that my father's family just accepted there's something wrong with him and moved on and lived their lives adjusting to what was wrong with my uncle. Back then, you don't really go seek psychological and medical help if someone's OFF. And my Uncle was OFF... Others would use the term SPECIAL.

Anyway, my Uncle had his idiosyncracies but he's more like an idiot savant that's OFF. I can't really be more eloquent. But he walks and eats on his own, and can converse with you, has a great singing voice even if he doesn't know the lyrics to the song, was very strong, was a big help to the family crops/produce business, was not dangerous at all, was mostly non-temperamental (until he hit his 40s when he became kinda masungit), had a particularly remarkable memory...

But of course, he can't do Math... would wait by the gate when he knows school girls are passing by going to and from school... would oggle girls... he couldn't really make big decisions... I can't really say that he had the mental capacity of a 5-year old because 5-year olds are capable already of lying while my Uncle never lied... never stole anything...

Anyway, he's way over 50 when his kidneys gave out. Bless my father's family, everyone rallied and pitched in. But his kidneys continued to deteriorate. He was up to two dialysis treatments already a week (and given his mental condition, isn't a candidate for organ transplant) and wqas manifesting so many complications already...

And last Wednesday, after being in the ICU for two days, he finally joined his Maker.

And tho tears sting my eyes right now, remembering that time when I was a child and I asked him to scratch my back and kept asking him to scratch harder and harder... and an aunt found us and realized my back was already bleeding (yeah, I wasn't aware that I've been scratched raw)... and my Uncle got in trouble with everyone, and got scolded pretty heavily... and I started crying so hard, more upset really that I got him in trouble... and everyone scolded him all the more as I cried all the more... though my eyes sting with that memory... all I can really feel for my Uncle is relief.

Because he's been really sick for a long time now... and the hundreds of thousands that have been spent over him for so many years can never really buy back his health... and I want his siblings to also be released from the 'burden' of caring for him..

I felt guilty for praying for his death ever since I learned that he was in the ICU for the Nth time. I think i'd always feel guilty.

But I believe everything that could be done for him has been done. And I know that I loved him. And I know that he loved us. It's just, his work here on earth is done.

So, Tito Jose... am really glad that you're already where everyone is equal.

Am just really sad for Lola though... no mother should ever have to bury a child.

*~*

JOSEPH PYRO turns 3 years old today. He's been calling us all week, inviting us to come over for his birthday. Too bad Ninang Rez has school.

Anyway, torn between supreme excitement and a quiet sadness, I texted his Mom that i've ordered his SpongeBob cake already... it's two tiers with SpongeBob standing on top. I just know he'd be so delighted with the cake!

Because his treatments require much financially, we'd only be preparing stuff and holding his birthday at my SIL's home. None of the Jollibee stuff he wanted (maybe when he's been declared finally cancer-free, we'd even have a catered something). But his cake is the most expensive yet that i'd ever have to buy for someone... because he still deserves to have a blast!

I intend to get people on videocam to wish him well... and make a CD for him later. Of course, am also the official photographer again.

~ insert deep breath here ~

I have yet to see a sign that Py's purpose in this world is done. And yet, he's also already been through sooo much.

But I really hope his mother wouldn't ever have to bury him. I really wish for his health so he can enjoy his childhood. I want him to have a long, happy life. I want him to grow up, get married and have kids someday.

I want to continue knowing him... and I want my future kids to know him. So God, let that BE, please!

And i'd like to just really thank everyone who have extended our family KINDNESS thorugh all this.